Anyone else ever buy, check out from the library or read this popular book, idea, movement, class, way of working on one’s life, the Artist’s Way?
There is a practice in there known as “Morning Pages”, and it’s an exercise of getting up early (usually before the rest of the world) and just writing. The suggestion is to write in long-hand in a journal so as to let the kinesthetic awareness match up with the brain and to actually process what it is that is being written. (I type. In 2019, decided it was time to learn to type at 57 almost 58, and practiced tutorials until I knew how-somehow I missed the class back in high school along with home economics and conversely, can’t sew).
My goal originally was to read it and clear a blockage of thought and negative energy that has consumed me from the inside out since 2011; ten years of a half-life and then some. Some of you know my saga (alas, it is) and some of you have no iota of an idea and it doesn’t matter because we all have our own stuff to deal with it. #Truth and #Word.
When looking at the ten years- it’s hard to put into words. Over ten years of my life lost in a lie and unable to pull past it, so much to the point that it destroyed relationships, finances and as we race to herd immunity amid social distancing and remote work situations, when coming up for air, look around and see that there are so many others like me. How did we get here? How do we pull back ahead? How do we regain our former successes when it seems so insurmountable? We don’t have a lot of choices, as it’s either do or do not. The other day, the news had a story about a man falsely imprisoned for rape for 30 years and the amount of money heis eligible for is not even close to what he lost. You can’t pay back what was stolen. So, where does the filling up come back? Through service. Through action. Through Gratitude. That man will never feel justice- and well aware of how that feels. Working through the helplessness is huge. We are seeing it now as a nation as we watch, listen and hear the details of the George Floyd trial. There are no words for the injustice and there is nothing that can fill that void, and maybe this is blasphemous, but not even God can fill that pain some days. (Think Julie Andrews on the top of a hill singing as she is seeking her inner peace, and spoiler alert, she gives up being a nun to be married)
Back to “The Morning Pages” – The whole point is to stop, take time to think and write and then process our thoughts. We all have them. And we truly become what we think. So, stop here with me and walk through this as we unpack that- we need to allow our thoughts to come out and express them, and we need to honor the good thoughts that propel us to that next level of living a full life. And we need to acknowledge and dispel the fears we have, write them down, work through them and conquer them. And Celebrate our Victories. For ten years all I thought about was my family and how fractured and how to put it back together. My kids didn’t feel it; I did. My work, finances, personal relationships, and all my goals disintegrated and here I am today, acutely aware and doing all to live a life of joy and purpose. I focused on my children and all I could do was send love and hope it was received as I wrote that over and over and over again. Typed, and written, and years of tear-stained, crinkled paper journals.
In most families that splinter- the reality is, it usually stays splintered. Maybe THAT was my job the last several years? My new analogy is that of a Tapestry, and it’s beautiful and then all of a sudden, you see a big gaffe or tear somewhere in the fabric, but or and, eventually, it all comes back together, with the ability to withstand all obstacles as they come along.
My now-adult children are AMAZING human beings. You will not see brighter “Mom-Beams” than from this CPG Foods person/ wanna-be writer (it’s why I finally learned to type-and wouldn’t you know, WORD now has a dictation option)
BIG CHANGES on the horizon and all for good. It is what it is, and it’s all good.
( A crazy vegan woman stole my copy, but that’s another story, and if someone needs a book that much, well, let’s hope they read it. This person recently smashed a rock through another person’s back car window and the SD Police Dept. has a copy of it on file, and for some reason, that brings me great joy). Suffice to say, I could write reams on how obnoxious the book thief, rock thrower is, is but that isn’t the point, the point was/is the Artist’s Way.)